Encouraging Word

Intro:
Our church family is participating in The Love Project, a church-wide initiative designed to learn together how to show love better to the community around us and to each other. This is week 4of a 10 week study which is teaching us keys to connect meaningfully with people around us, and make a lifelong impact in our community by loving others! Hi, this is Dorette Schaal with an encouraging word for your day. As we continue this journey, thank you for joining us. Together we can make love a way of life, and positively change our world. Here is your encouraging word about forgiveness for today.

Monday
This week as we look at forgiveness as one of the 7 powerful characteristics of a loving person, I want you to consider what forgiveness does not do.

1. It does not come easily
2. It does not remove all the consequences of wrongdoing
3. It does not immediately restore trust
4. It does not remove the offense from one’s memory

What does forgiveness do? It brings reconciliation and closure when it is received. Most importantly, it brings release to the one who gives it. So we know that offering forgiveness can really be a challenge, it won’t make everything right overnight, or restore trust immediately, and certainly the mind will try to hold on to the negative memory as long as possible. So is forgiveness worth the effort it takes? Most definitely!! When we make the choice to walk in forgiveness, we are putting love to the test. Do I love enough to make this right? Do I love the other person enough to make this right? Do I love myself enough to make this right? For the believer, our answer gets to be yes! Sometimes forgiveness happens one small scoop at a time, in other words, to take the whole mountain of pain down at once can be overwhelming. It can happen supernaturally, but most often, forgiveness begins with a choice to forgive, and becomes reality as each time a thought of the person who did you wrong comes to mind, you choose forgiveness once again. We once had a huge mountain to forgive, when an employer we trusted, stripped our livelihood and our reputation through false statements he made about us. Heartbroken, we had a choice. Does this man deserve forgiveness? In our minds, not for how he treated us. But did we know we would forgive? Yes Did it come easily? No. Did it take time? Yes. Did the relationship ever get restored? No. But forgiveness was necessary, and it brought healing to us. We were released from the evil accusations completely. And it was up to God to take care of the rest. Forgiveness may not come easily, but definitely worth the effort for peace in your life.

Tuesday
As we look at forgiveness as one of the 7 key characterisitics of a loving person, I can’t help but think of how forgiveness can change the world. I don’t know how often I have been in a store and have had someone bump into me and there is no acknowledgement on their part even to ask for forgiveness. Especially in foreign countries, and particularly in large cities, manners kind of go out the window. It is pretty much every man for himself….hold your ground, and stake your claim. Being the kind of person I am, I will say I’m sorry whether I was the one who accidentally bumped someone or not. One thing we have done with our kids when it comes to forgiveness is this. First you say you are sorry, then you ask the person, “Will you forgive me?” Because this isn’t standard practice in many homes, when the question is asked, “Will you forgive me?”, often the person doesn’t know how to respond. In our minds, as parents, we think this helps to solidify in our kids that forgiveness isn’t just a sloppy, “I’m sorry”, with the tone, “I’m sorry I got caught”, but it really is an act of forgiveness, and true repentance. How are you at asking, will you forgive me? There are so many times when we have the opportunity to show that we love, by being the first to ask for forgiveness. How hard is that to do? For some people it is excruciating. For others, it comes easily, because they have chosen to walk in love, cover things in love, and let the love of God on the inside of them really be authentic. So this week, why not do a forgiveness check. Are there things holding you in bondage because you have not forgiving someone? Do you want the chains of unforgiveness wrapped around your life? Or do you want to be released and have the opportunity for reconciliation. Let’s be lovers - with God’s kind of love – and forgive.

Wednesday
Would you say that you are a forgiving person? As we look at forgiveness as one of the seven characteristics of a loving person again today, I’ll ask the question again. Would you say that you are a forgiving person? According to Gary Chapman’s book called Love as a way of life, there are three things that will help you become more of a forgiving person. Here they are:

Forgive yourself – Self condemning words and actions are self destructive.

Apologize for your own failures in relationships – get real, you contributed in some way.

Have an authentic attitude of love toward others – be open to forgive, no matter how long it takes.

I have observed, in general, that women often can be the hardest on themselves when it comes to forgiveness. They can be lavish in their love and forgiveness of others, but they will keep on kicking themselves for years over past mistakes. Women and men, need to say, it’s in the past, I’ve admitted my part in the situation, I’ve asked for forgiveness, so leave it there. It is under the blood. Jesus died so we can be forgiven, so I can forgive me. Once we get past that hurdle, being truthful and not coloring or sugar coating our own contribution to the problem can be the next issue. Of all the counseling I have done, it is becoming increasingly evident, that there is always another angle to the story you are hearing. The other person involved sees it a whole different way. We do need to own up to our own failures and mistakes. Once we begin to make positive changes, stick to them. The third part that helps with becoming a more forgiving person is choosing to keep forgiving, even if it takes a while. I’ve noticed that sometimes, forgiveness is a daily choice that can takes persistence and time. In my own case, it took a year of everyday saying, I choose to forgive the person who wronged me. Almost a year to the day, when I thought about that person, there was not more knot in my stomach. I was totally released, and free. So are you becoming a more forgiving person? I know you can be, because of the power of the love of God on the inside of you!

Thursday
This week we have been talking about forgiveness as a characteristic of love. In any long term positive relationship, there will be opportunities for forgiveness. Misunderstandings occur, we can offend others, and we can do hurtful things. We can be the one who offended another, and sometimes that happens without us even realizing it. I’ve had someone come up to me and say I forgive you, and I had no idea they were not offended by me. That can happen when we innocently walk past someone without acknowledging them, or when they think I am thinking one thing when I am not. I have made a choice in my own life to be un offendable. I’m not sure that is a word, but there are times when there is the opportunity to be offended, and I choose not to get offended. That’s being unoffendable! Let’s always choose to walk in love. There are times to address hurtful situations, but we can be confident , that God will give the necessary grace to cover offenses. When we put ourselves in the other’s shoes, we can often see things from a totally different perspective and it changes the situation dramatically. To be un offendable, takes believing the best in people. It takes realizing that someone might be having a hard day. It takes an understanding that there are battles people are facing in their lives that we may never know about. It takes understanding that hormones, emotions and pain can make people do things that they don’t mean to do and say things they don’t mean to say. It takes love! It takes forgiveness! It takes the Word of God on the inside of us to keep our mouths and our hearts lined up with God’s thoughts and actions. We know that His thoughts are higher than ours, but we can walk the higher road, and begin seeing things how he sees them. Life and relationships deserve our forgiveness. Let’s become mature in our relationships, and make the choice to forgive. We have that power available through Christ, let’s be the best forgivers on the planet!

Friday
What is more powerful than a heart that is set free. As we conclude this week talking about forgiveness as a characteristic of a loving person, I must say that there is such great joy in seeing someone released from the chains of the past when they decide to forgive. It is such joy to see the joy come back to one who has held onto past hurts, and chooses to let them go. Seeing people set free is one of the greatest joys of serving in ministry. With the unspeakable things that are in the past of some of those we come into contact with, we can understand the forgiveness dilemma. The questions and the blame and guilt can be overwhelming. But we serve a God who can turn situations around. What has happened in the past, does not have to color our future. We can walk free. In Christ we are free to be everything God desires for us, regardless of our past. What a great God we serve!
As we close out this week, remember these powerful words of forgiveness:
I’m sorry
I didn’t mean to disappoint you
I will change my actions
I will forgive you
I will release you
I will love you.
These forgiveness words can change your world. When we learn to give forgiveness and receive forgiveness, we are demonstrating the characteristics of a loving person, and that is who we are called to be!

Eword for Kids Saturday
This week we are talking about the power of forgives as a characteristic of love. It is easy to love some one who loves us, isn’t it? It is simple to do that! What is harder is to still be nice and loving to those who don’t treat you well. Did you know that we can return good for bad, and demonstrate forgiveness as a loving person? When someone mistreats you at school, the easiest thing to do is to try to retaliate, and to treat them badly too. What love does is the opposite. What love does is determine to choose the right thing to do, even when everyone else is doing wrong, and even when it is hard. We can begin practicing forgiveness in little ways, and offer apologies even when nothing deliberately was done. Can you easily say these words?
I am sorry
I wasn’t thinking
Please forgive my behavior, my actions, my words
Will you forgive me?
Those words can make every relationship better. When others are unkind to you, or mistreat you, because of the love of God in your heart, you can say
I forgive you
I release you
I will choose to love you.
That’s authentic love, and true forgiveness.
You are capable of being the loving and forgiving person God has called you to be!

Sunday
Today , we are looking at the power of forgiveness as a characteristic that should be a part of our life. The world seems to be catching on to what the church has known for a long time, and that is that forgiveness isn’t for the other person, it is a complete release for you. Forgiveness is finding freedom from the grip of anger. I really like Gary Chapman’s new definition of forgiveness. It is using honesty, compassion and self awareness to reconcile with someone who has hurt you. Everyone of us have had the opportunity to walk in unforgiveness, because everyone of us have been hurt by someone in some way or another. When we choose to forgive, we are releasing the power of love to cover over a wrong that was done to us. When we address relationships, there is always the potential for misunderstanding. As well as you can know someone before you marry them, (the more the better, I would say) after you say I do, there are still going to be areas where you will misunderstand each other. It happens in marriage, it happens in friendships, it happens at work, it even happens at church. People get offended, and sometimes will even borrow someone else’s offense and begin to walk in bitterness for the wrong that they perceived was done to them or the one they love. In life, perception really is everything! Can we as the body of Christ get past those kinds of situations? I believe we can, and it flows from choosing to love, and then choosing to operate in the characteristic of love which is forgiveness. Because we are believers, we have had the greatest example of all when it comes to forgiveness. Think of Jesus on the cross saying, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Think of Jesus being betrayed, and then breaking bread with his followers that same evening, knowing that his betrayer was in the room. The acts of service and love that Jesus did just at the last supper and the cross are some of the greatest examples we can find of how to make the choice to forgive. Jesus operated in love….the greatest lover of all time was the greatest forgiver of all time.